• Keeping Friends


Published: May 14, 2007 | Last Updated: November 17, 2020 By | 4 Replies Continue Reading

Well, we really haven’t even settled on the final title yet, but I’m excited to have signed a contract with Peter Mayer’s Overlook Press to write my first book! The topic is one that is perennially meaningful to women of all ages–female friendships. As a woman and as a psychologist, the subject is one I think about often. How do friendships evolve and change over the course of one’s life?

Most of us have had special relationships with friends that we were sure would last forever—until they came to a grinding halt. Because of the significant role that friendships play at every stage of a woman’s life, the hurt and loss associated with a fractured friendship can be excruciating. It can feel as bad as being jilted by a lover. Afterwards, we tend to second-guess ourselves, wondering who was at fault, what could have prevented the breakup, and how similar painful situations can be avoided in the future.

Whether the relationship blows up in your face or just vanishes over time, most of us come to realize that many friendships don’t last forever. The book I am writing, tentatively titled Fractured Friendships, is slated for publication in Spring, 2008. It is dedicated to women of every age who have loved and lost a female friend and want to understand, recover, and move forward.I hope that the readers of this blog will comment and share their experiences so we can learn more about ourselves and the nature of friendship.



Comments (4)

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  1. Anonymous says:

    hi irene….am havin sum problm..just found yor blog…hope u ll help me…me and my best friend ,we knw each other frm childhood..am vry much possesive abt her…recently we had a fight…n she said dat am immature..and dis ll be problm to me in future…i just cant bare those words..in past even though i don call in talk to her, she oly used to call …but nw all things hav changed…wen ever we fit she used to say don compare u wit ny one…but nw i don fell the warm in friendship lik before…i don get it..is this my mistake or what??….she is havin more new frnds…am feeling vry insecure.. i dono wat to do…plss help me

  2. Anonymous says:

    My biggest friendship related regret involves a friendship that went through my late teens and early twenties that I basically found myself running away from in my 30’s. Through therapy, I came to the realization that the reason it didn’t work was that it was a reflection of the dynamic of the relationship that I had with my father (which I also ran away from). I would really like to mend the friendship someday, but I would want to approach it as the tools I have now. I am doubtful that we could resist going into the same roles, and if I would have the time and energy (she, like my father, required a lot of time and emotional energy, although she was willing to give back equally) to maintain it.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Hi Irene
    What a great blog! So many ideas to explore. Can’t wait to read the book. Good Luck with all of this! Best Wishes, Jan

  4. Anonymous says:

    What a great blog — I’ll come here often!
    – Jen

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