• Few or No Friends

Moving and leaving my best friend behind

Published: May 9, 2012 | Last Updated: August 29, 2013 By | 14 Replies Continue Reading


Hi Irene,

My step mum does not want my dad or his family living with her so we are moving back to England. I now have to leave my best friend and I don’t want to. Can people stay best friends when they live in different country? She is the only person that understands me and is basically a sister to me.

Signed, Claire


Hi Claire,

I’m not sure how old you are. Whatever your age, it’s hard to move away from a best friend or to have a best friend move away from you.

It isn’t easy to replace best friends. My hope is that you will remain connected to your friend through the Internet, Skype phone calls, and perhaps, even letters and visits.

Moving across the pond will certainly change the nature of your friendship because you won’t be able to share as many experiences or get together spontaneously. Hopefully, you will find new friends back home. Since it’s your native country, it may be easier to make friends there than it was when you were away.

Just thinking: Your mom must be going through a rough time too! All good wishes on
your move—I hope this helps.

Warm regards, Irene

Prior posts about moving and friendship:

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Category: Moving and friendship

Comments (14)

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  1. leah says:

    i am so ad I live I uk and now I am moving to new Zealand! I have only just made friends in the uk as I was bullied before and now I have found friends I am moving away I don’t want to but I know I have to it is hard to come to terms with the fact I am moving to the other side of the world and I haven’t told my friends that I am moving yet how do I tell them without hurting there feelings? I am moving this week!

  2. A. Nay says:

    I just moved away from my best friend and now we are going to move again even farther. We are still great friends with each other through email and phone calls but I miss her a lot. I can only imagine what it would be like to move to another country. I hope that you can maybe be happy a little bit

    • leah says:

      I feel ya xx

    • Tia says:

      Well, it’s kinda weird with me. My dad got a job offer, and then another. He’s going for an interview this Tuesday (Sept. 20 2016) in Connecticut and that’s four hours away. We’re not doing the best on Rochester which is worse because if I moved there it’s only an hour away to visit. WHY! Warm Wishes Tia 🙂

  3. Aby says:

    last year .. i had to move away from my own home .. my stepfather basicly kicked me out .. and all i knew is that i wont survive without my bestfriend .. well after she knew it was so dramatic and messy .. she cried like a baby .. she bagged me to say and live with her but i just couldnt .. so i left to live with my grandparents .. the 2 first months were sensitive .. we couldnt handle the distance so we stopped talking .. after that i did my best to go and visit her which i did .. from my first visit she was so happy to see me .. she hugged me like crazy we couldnt take our eyes off each other .. and then it all went wrong when took off .. even from my second visit we were so cold till now .. it sucks yeah

  4. LaTrice says:

    My best friend moved to another state to pursue a career in medicine. Although I hated to see her go, I wanted to be supportive, and encourage her to go after her dreams.

    We did stay in touch by phone calls, emails, and text messages. Also, we would visit each other.

    If you really love and care about your best friend, you need to stay in touch.

  5. Lee Ann says:

    I was devastated at first, because i honestly did not know what i was going to do without her. I was also afraid that the distance between us would kill the friendship and closeness that we had. I thought I was being overly sensitive and dramatic (maybe even a little pathetic) but she just meant to much to me. I actually cried when i got home after saying goodbye to her.

  6. sarah says:

    i’m leaving my best friend to live with my mom and that’s when my best friend will need me the most cause shes getting heart surgery. and i don’t want to just forget about each other. i just want to know because i’m moving a half hour away from her and shes moving a half hour away in the opposite direction. i just want to know if me and her will still be friends or not because don’t want to loose her.

  7. Anonymous says:

    It is hard saying goodbye to your bestfriend because you have been friends for so long so It will be hard at first but you will come round in the end and it is also nice to make new friends just stay in contact

  8. Anonymous says:

    I was “best friends” with a woman when we were both in our 20s, buying our first homes, having back yard parties, playing tennis. We enjoyed our time together and with our husbands.

    Then she moved. we moved. Life Moved on. Kathy and I stayed in touch, worked to visit……..and stay connected one way or another.

    We just “celebrated” 40 years of friendship by going to a wonderful spa/fitness center in Mexico for a week. We chatted for 7 straight days. Took walks, enjoyed Rancho La Pueerta and each other. Can’t wait to go back.

    Yes, friendships can last. We’ve both had children, now grand children, serious illnesses, lost family members and over the years shared our lives on the phone, by mail and getting together every year or so.

    It takes effort but friendships can be sustained through lots of changes.

  9. Anonymous says:

    It wasnt as far as moving to a different country, but my best friend did move to the other side of the country.

    Just as you said, my best friend was like my sister. I didnt have a biological sister, but she was the closest thing i had to it. She was my wingman, my confidant, my rock.

    I was devistated at first, because i honestly did not know what i was going to do without her. I was also afraid that the distance between us would kill the friendship and closeness that we had. I thought i was being overly sensative and dramatic (maybe even a little pathetic) but she just meant to much to me. I actually cried when i got home after saying goodbye to her.

    With that being said, it has now been two years since she moved and we are still as close as ever. When we get to talk (and also when we get to see each other when we visit) it’s as if she never left. We fall right back into the way things were. Even with all those miles between us, she is still my wingman, confidant and rock.

    I will say, however, that her leaving gave me the opportunity to appreciate the other friends that i had. It gave me the ability to get closer to them and realize that she wasnt my only friend! I’m sure you will get this opportunity as well as you embark on finding new friends!

    Best of luck to you! I hope everything works out for the best!

    • Lee Ann says:

      I feel you…..

    • Genya says:

      Thanks, I needed to hear that, my very best friends (a family) are just about to move, we won’t be able to see each other as much and that’s a fact. The friendship will continue in another form. I have already reached out to get together with more people and forge stronger connections with casual friends. I’m easy to get along with and so, with a bit of a broken heart I go..

  10. Anonymous says:

    I was so sad when my best friend in my neighborhood moved to a different state. We said we’d stay in touch and we have, but it’s been years, our kids have grown, and I’ve never even been to her house to visit. She did come to visit me a month ago and stayed for 2 weeks and we had a great, grand time. You can stay friends, especially today with Skype and email.

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