14-year-old who feels worthless and has trouble making friends
If you are feeling worthless and depressed, it can be hard to be friendly.
QUESTION
Hello!
My name is Hanna and I am 14 years old. I have had close friends but I always end up losing them because there is always one person that comes between us and takes my friend away from me.
It always happens and it’s happening right now. There’s this girl who is around us whenever I look and always steals my friend away from me. I never get to have time alone with my close friend because of her.
I am an only child and have no close cousins. I feel incredibly alone and depressed. I feel like I have no one and that I am worthless. Making friends is kind of hard for me because I am very shy and awkward.
I really don’t know what to do and I hope u can help me.:(
Signed, Hanna
ANSWER
HI Hanna,
People who are shy often have trouble making friends, especially during their teenage years when they are especially self-conscious. Moreover, shy people are generally far more comfortable being with people they know (as opposed to a new people). They also find it easier to have one-on-one relationships than to be with groups.
But groups of three can be challenging even for people who aren’t shy. So in this situation, you will really need to put forth some effort that may take you out of your comfort zone.
When another girlfriend gets involved with you and your friend, she isn’t necessarily trying to take something away from you or get between you. She may be just as eager to have friends as you are. I hope that you can give this new girl a chance and see if all three of you might become friends. You might even discover that you like her more than your close friend.
Apart from your shyness, if you are feeling depressed and worthless, it can make it very hard to be upbeat and friendly with people you meet. I hope you can speak with an adult you trust, either your mom or a teacher at school, to see if they can help you understand these feelings and find some way to address them.
Hope this helps.
Best, Irene
Category: Teen friendships