Another reason why the fantasy, Best Friends Forever (BFF),
isn’t all it’s cracked up to be: When the all-consuming, all-fulfilling,
one-and-only female friendship in your life fizzles out or blows up, you’re
left in excruciating pain. And there’s no one to talk to or share your misery
with. Generally, you would call your Bestie—but she’s the problem!
If you ever have unexpectedly lost a friendship that you were
sure would last forever, you must realize that it is always a good idea to
encircle yourself with more than just one best friend…
The idea isn’t a new one. Beginning in the late 1800s, Amish
women formed quilting circles to share expertise and companionship. After they
had finished individual patches for a quilt, they would come together
(sometimes over long distances) to lend a hand in piecing them together. The
quilters socialized as they sewed, developing long-lasting bonds that became
part of the fabric of the Amish culture.
A study published in the American Sociological Review two
years ago (June 2006) reported that the circle of close friends held by
Americans over the past two decades has shrunk markedly. (This landmark
research was the first nationally representative study on this topic over that
time period.) During the same period, the researchers found that the number of
people who said that had no close confidants had doubled.
What can we do to increase the number of female
relationships that nurture and sustain us? Get ready to form a circle: a regular
meeting of a group of women who share meet over a shared interest or activity.
Here are some ideas:
1) Form a knitting or sewing circle, possibly with a
2) Play canasta, bridge or mah-jongg
3) Take to the links
4) Join a bowling team
5) Create a scrabble club
6) Start a book group
7) Join a cooking club
The options are endless; the chances for starting new
friendships are boundless too.