An old friend calls out of the blue and a young teen wonders whether she should jump back into the friendship.
Dear Friendship Doctor,
So my question is should I try and salvage a relationship with my best friend?
We have been friends since seventh grade until we graduated. She decided I shouldn’t go to her graduation because an old mutual friend that I had a falling out with was going. We had been planning our graduations out and checking dates to make sure we could go to each other’s graduations since we found out I was going to be home schooled for high school.
It has been seven months since we have spoken and out of the blue she calls. She asked for me to forgive her but I don’t know if I want to or if I should believe her when she says she’s sorry. Any advice?
After a long period has elapsed, it’s natural that once-friends would move on and feel like the friendship has ended. So it had to come as a surprise when your friend called out of the blue.
When someone disappoints us, we usually become somewhat skeptical of the friendship. A few questions that might help guide your decision about whether or not to forgive her:
- Do you miss this friendship?
- Did you feel like her apology was sincere?
- Do you understand why she disinvited you?
- Was this a one-time disappointment, or one of a string of disappointments?
People do learn and grow, becoming better people and better friends in the process. Weighing the pros and cons, only you can decide if you want to give the friend another chance.
Hope this helps.
Previously on The Friendship Blog:
Category: Making up after breaking up