Recent Press

Click here to see Dr. Levine's advice on how to handle a sticky mother-in-law problem posed by Life & Beauty Weekly~

At one time, 10 at night was the time you hit the town, instead of hitting the sheets. And 3 in the morning was when the bars closed and you feared nursing a hangover, instead of nursing a hungry infant. Ah, the difference one positive pregnancy test and a lifetime of love can make.

If you're like many new young moms, you're among the first of your friends to have children. This life change can be awkward terrain to navigate. While your friends are still living the carefree life, you're carefully nurturing this incredible life you've been blessed with. And when you pick up the phone to call a friend, it can be hard to find someone with whom to trade breastfeeding tips instead of barhopping anecdotes.

To be honest, there's nothing like the empathetic ear and helpful sounding board that a fellow mom provides. So how can new moms branch out and find other mommy friends while still maintaining friendships with their single or childless friends?...

Psychiatrists and psychologists have long heralded the importance of friendships in an individual's emotional well-being. And for a young mom traversing the world of motherhood, such relationships are absolutely critical.

"Having friends to rely upon for trust, support and advice are essential at every stage of a woman's life," says Dr. Irene S. Levine, author of Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend (Overlook Press, 2009) and a professor of psychiatry at the New York University School of Medicine. "A growing body of research suggests that close friendships enhance a woman's health and emotional well-being. Having a network of close friends is associated with lower blood pressure, decreased heart rate, lower cholesterol levels and decreased risk of depression."

Click here to read the rest of the article.

First for Women - March 27, 2010

Click here to read The Friendship Doctor's advice on how to react if you are rebuffed when you try to mend a fractured friendship.

Find New Friends Fast

By Catherine Ryan

Have you lost touch with old girlfriends? Or recently moved to a new town? Finding a new BFF is easier than you might think.

Read Catherine Ryan's interview with Dr. Levine here:

Sister Summit: How Four Sisters Rebuilt Their Support Network Across the Miles

by Polly Campbell

From GaiamLife

At midlife and across great distance from each other, Sandi McCann and her sisters have found affirmation and accountability for taking steps toward their life goals by creating their own long-distance take on a support group. Here's how they're doing it and how you can too.

And family connections can be especially powerful, because the shared history among siblings provides a solid foundation for the relationship, says psychologist Irene Levine, author of Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend.

The February 2010 issue of Good Housekeeping includes a wonderful article called The Friendship Factor about children's friendships and the angst moms experience about them. More importantly it provides concrete advice about how parents can guide your child's forays into the world of friendships----including advice from Dr. Irene S. Levine, the Friendship Doctor.

Click here to see the online version.

Award-winning author and journalist Margie Goldsmith, a global traveler who has visited 113 countries and racked up almost as many frequent flier miles as George Clooney, selected Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend as a great in-flight read in January/February 2010 issue of Women's Running Magazine. Goldsmith said the book is "filled with stories and wisdom."

Click here to read the article.

An excellent article by Kate Fillion in the January 2010 issue of Chatelaine (the Canadian magazine) describes the reasons why your once-BFF can suddenly disappear from your life.

Kate interviewed Dr. Levine extensively for the article, calling Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend "that rare self-help book that not only delivers but also has something new to say."

Click here to read the article. 

BEST FRIEND BREAKUPS

How do you tell your girlfriends you've been dumped by a best buddy?

That's one topic most women steer clear of discussing, especially with other female friends, says Chappaqua psychologist Irene S. Levine, author of "Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend" ($15.95, The Overlook Press).

In fact, says Levine, women are so tight-lipped about their friendship failures that most who agreed to be interviewed for her book requested anonymity.

"There's this romanticized notion I grew up with, that you're supposed to stick with your friends forever, and friends are supposed to be perfect,'' says Levine, an NYU professor whose research for the book included surveys of more 1,500 women. "To a large extent, women are judged by their ability to make and maintain friends.''

The truth, however, is that friendships can be fleeting, especially those that arise through the changing phases of a woman's life, she says. And best-friend breakups are far more common than most women realize.

In her book, Levine, who grew up in Bayside, Queens, writes about her own first best friend, a fourth-grade classmate named Annie, who moved away during high school and left behind a broken heart.

Although she's never experienced an explosive breakup with a close friend - or endured one of the "friendship felonies" she details in the book (infidelity, theft, assault, humiliation) - Levine writes that friendships end for a variety of reasons. And most women need help coping, whether they initiate the breakup or are blindsided by a dump.

What's the best way to shut down a friendship that ceases to add value?

First, be absolutely sure you want that friendship to end, advises Levine. Sometimes reducing the intensity of the relationship might be enough to sustain a friendship through a questionable patch.

When you're ready to end a relationship, "prepare yourself to do it in as gracious and as kind a way as possible,'' she says. And know that it's going to be tough.

To help soften the blow, white lies are permissible, assures Levine, as in "I'm so busy with work right now'' or "My kids are consuming me" or "I just need a little time for myself.''

If you find yourself on the receiving end of a breakup, give yourself time to recover, she says.

"It's somewhat shocking, so you don't want to lash back or engage in too much conversation immediately,'' says Levine. Although the first inclination is to wonder if you did something wrong, or to apologize, sometimes friendships end for no obvious reason, or for reasons that are "mysterious."

As Levine reports in the book, she was deeply hurt when a good friend stopped returning her phone calls without explanation. Only years later did she learn the friend was going through a family crisis that had nothing to do with her. She is grateful, she writes, that they were able to resurrect their relationship.

In many ways, says Levine, female friendships are vastly different from those among men.

And though many women claim their husbands are their best friends, she says men can't relate to some of the topics that women enjoy discussing - bathing-suit woes, hair issues, mammography discomfort - no matter how sympathetic they are.

Her own husband, Dr. Jerome Levine, is an NYU professor of psychiatry who retired recently as deputy director of the Nathan S. Kline Institute for Psychiatric Research in Orangeburg. (The couple are the co-authors of "Schizophrenia for Dummies," which came out earlier this year.)

And though he acknowledges there is a wide range of behaviors among men and women, Dr. Levine agrees that women tend to approach friendship differently.

"In general, I think that women need or enjoy or value more intimacy and sharing feelings amongst themselves than men do,'' he says. "I think that men prefer to do things together and share things together with other men - going to the ball game or playing golf - whereas I think women prefer opportunities to share feelings more."

For Irene Levine, writing the book made her realize just how important her friendships were, and found her vowing to devote more time to nurturing those relationships.

One of her closest friends is Donna Dellaero, who hosted a party at her Chappaqua salon, Donna Hair Design, when "Best Friends Forever" was released in September.

Dellaero, who started off as Levine's hair stylist, says the women have a "tight" friendship.

"She's pushed me to be a better person,'' says Dellaero, who admires Levine's problem-solving skills. "We opened up with each other.''

Women who endure a sour end to a friendship should learn from the experience, reflect on the good memories and never stop trying to make new friends, says Levine. The health benefits of friendship are well documented, she adds.

"If you have the slightest thought that it's selfish to seek out friendships, you have to consider that it's essential for your well being and that of your loved ones,'' she says.

Click here to see the original article.

Sophia Dembling and Jenna Schnuer are the brains (and creative travel writers) behind the site called, Flyover America. I was delighted when they asked me to tell them about one of my favorite meeting places right in my hometown.

They added their own and titled the piece: Drink, Sit, Talk: Places to Stop.

AOL Lemondrop

December 2, 2009

By Dorkys Ramos

You swore you'd be BFFs til the end of time, but lately the friendship has been heading straight towards a flatline. And when there's no hope for recovery, sometimes it's simply best to pull the plug on the relationship.

"It's important to recognize that not all friendships last forever," says Dr. Irene S. Levine, professor of psychiatry at NYU and author of "Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend." "They're dynamic and change over time, and two friends don't always change in the right direction." Here, she gives us the how-to on parting ways with your best friend.

Click here to read the rest of the article.

December 1, 2009

Check out Victoria Clayton-Alexander's interview with Dr. Levine, published in Exurb Magazine.

For middle-aged moms flocking to 'New Moon,' it's a chance to recapture fantasies of teen romance

11/25/09
by Rosemary Black

Smoldering looks and soulful gazes, yes, but not one single sex scene and only four kisses in the entire movie. So, why are so many middle-aged mothers flocking to see "The Twilight Saga: New Moon"? Fantasy, says psychologist Irene Levine, a professor at the New York University School of Medicine.

"It's an escape," she said. "Given the state of politics and the economy, it makes for a very nice night out."

Click here to read more.