Weddings can be tense but this bridesmaid problem seems to have started long before the wedding.
I asked one of my girlfriends to be a bridesmaid at my wedding a couple months ago, but every time I ask her if she wants to get together, she doesn’t answer me. She literally hasn’t said a word to me since I asked her to be a bridesmaid.
She and I used to be the best of friends, but then we sort of just drifted apart, but like we were still like, cool. Usually she would only call me because she wanted something. And I’m the type of person who likes taking care of my friends, but only to a point, I guess you could say.
I’m not asking her to pay for anything, either. I think after everything I’ve done for her it wouldn’t be so hard for her to spend a little time with me? For example, last weekend I texted her to see if she wanted to grab lunch (which I was treating her to) and she never responded. Checked my Facebook and she had a status up that said something along the lines of ‘bored who wants to kick it?’
I feel horrible, because I don’t want to ruin our “friendship”, but I just don’t think she’s as close to me as I thought. How can I do this delicately?
Thank you for your time.
Weddings can create a great deal of tension among the members of the wedding party. But it sounds like this “friendship” was on a very weak footing to start and hasn’t gotten any better. You’re been too kind to someone who sounds rude and unappreciative.
You need to clear up this fiasco as soon as possible so it doesn’t detract from the joy of your big day. There’s no way you can be delicate; you need to be direct. Send your friend/bridesmaid an email or call her: Tell her you need to meet with her face-to-face talk ASAP to figure out what’s going on and why she won’t respond.
If she doesn’t agree to get together, it’s time for a breakup email that tells her that, regrettably, you’ve changed your mind about her participation in the wedding party because you’ve grown so distant.
Hope this helps!
Other posts on The Friendship Blog about bridesmaids from hell:
Category: Bridezillas and other monsters