Favors and Money
This topic contains 3 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Suzannah 10 months, 2 weeks ago.
January 25, 2013 at 3:24 pm #81307
Janice- I think this issue represents more than you are seeing…it displays that she has not understanding of the situation that you are facing..by helping her with such a huge favor, she doesn’t seem to understand the gravity of your reality, the true implications of your financial situation..medical issues are huge, and so are unemployment…I think it shows a real imbalnce in the friendhsip
As soon as possible, so she can make other arrangements, I would say, I hate that my budget doesn’t allow me to go to your next appointment, I appreciate the 20$, and wish I could just accompany you because I want to but in my current situation I do not have the luxury, of driving that far for 20$..
and I do see the insult, with the 20$…just sorta has a feeling of ‘she should be happy to have it”…you know her, does that at all seem accurate?
But I think if you feel it would go well, it would be worth talking to her about paying you a fair amount.
January 28, 2013 at 12:40 pm #81857
Thank you, Suzanna, that’s very helpful. I don’t think she’s being arrogant in her giving me $20, probably more like uneducated re gas/mileage and just not thinking so much about my situation as opposed to her own which, admittedly, is grave and I would rather be me than her, with my job/money problems and all.
However, your point is well taken. Being as she is so dependent, it might be not only caring of her, but in her own best interest to inquire what I might need financially or otherwise to be able to continue to provide these services for her.
If it were me, and admittedly I’m a very practical person, I would say, “gee, being as you’re not working, would you be interested in driving me to appts., etc, and we’ll figure out a fair rate so you can make some money and I can do what I need to do. It would really help me out and maybe help you with a little extra income.”
Thank you so much for replying. I think I will just broach the subject with her and see what happens. I’m hoping for a good outcome, but if it isn’t, then I am being taken advantage of, and that’s not on me, that’s on her.
I’ll keep you posted. Wish me luck.
January 28, 2013 at 9:09 pm #81914
Good Luck, Janice. You really do sound like a thoughtful person, I hope your own situation is improved very soon, this economy has hit my family hard, I was laid off, so I do have an understanding of the financial restraints you are dealing with.
But be mindful, mixing business and friendship can be tricky, and to be honest…she has been shown to not be a very considerate friend (in the way, of not thinking of exactly the extent of these favors only), so make the defination of your employment very clear..most people don’t like paying for what they had been getting for free.
An unless she has never owned or driven a car, she does understand the cost of gas..I think there is a chance she is playing on your sympathy…BUT this is a comment forum, so if we were in person the situation might feel totally different to me…take my opinion for what it is worth..not much!!!
Best of luck